


Hunt and Peck

by FuchsiaMae



Category: Portal (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Not Shippy, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-02
Updated: 2012-11-02
Packaged: 2019-08-02 02:36:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16296653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FuchsiaMae/pseuds/FuchsiaMae
Summary: "Imagine your OTP typing by hunt-and-peck."(Originally posted to Tumblr 11/2/12)





	Hunt and Peck

This couldn’t possibly be that hard. 

Cave stared down the typewriter like a bull before a matador. It was women’s work, and menial, and way below him – but Caroline had said casually that he couldn’t do it on his own. 

He was about to cut her a big slice of humble pie. 

All he had to do was type up this letter. No dictation, no notes, just one little letter. And he already knew what to write, because he was the one writing it. Hell, this should be even easier than dictating to her. He could probably type it up twice as fast! How would she like it if he did all his own typing from now on, huh? Maybe he could let her do a memo or two every once in a while, but that would be because she liked to, not because he needed her to. As a present from her generous boss.

If he could just figure out how to load the thing…

The paper went in front of the wheel thing, right? But how did you get it in there? He tried to jab it in, but only succeeded in crumpling the edge of the stationery. Hm. 

“Sir?”

He looked up to see his assistant leaning in the office doorway, trying not to smile. 

“Do you need anything?”

Smug was not a good look on her. “Nope.” He went back to jamming the rumpled paper into the machine. 

“Are you sure?” She peered over the machine, and he glared.

“I got it.”

“Would you like me to load the paper for you, sir? I know you can,” she added, cutting off his protests, “but I feel bad making you do my job.”

“Well…”

“Please?”

“Alright, fine." 

Her face broke into a grin, and in an instant she had a fresh sheet neatly rolled onto the paper feed. "Call me if you need anything else.” He glared at her retreating back as she ducked out. 

Okay. Paper was ready. Time to write this letter.

_Dear Mr. Jacobson._

_Dear._

_D_.

Where the hell was the letter D?

Ah, there it was. Now the E… Okay. Okay! He was getting somewhere!

dearmr.jacobson

…Something wasn’t right here. 

How did you put the spaces in? Was there a key for that? He hunted and pecked for a minute or two, but everything just produced another letter – until he finally hit the long one at the bottom.  _There_  it was.

There ought to be capital letters around here somewhere, too… but the thing only had one set of keys…

After tapping around for a while, he finally started to get the hang of it. But this paper was shot to hell – and he’d be damned if he was gonna let Caroline load him another one.  _Okay, Johnson. You can do this_. 

He grabbed another sheet of stationery and started to pull the old one out, but stopped himself just in time. Better to get a look at how it was supposed to go. So he peered around the roller – okay, it went under the roller – and got secured by those little clip things. Got it. 

He tried it himself, getting the paper in place as Caroline had… and then she’d turned that knob…

And the paper went in! “Hah!” This typing thing wasn’t so bad after all. 

Now back to the letter.

_D_

_De_

_Des_

Shit. Where the hell was the eraser on this thing?

“How’s it coming, sir?”

There she was again, and that smile was harder to hide. Dammit. “Fine.”

“Doing alright?”

“Doing great,” he growled. “Don’t you have stuff to do?”

“Can I see?”

“No – ” He hunched over the machine, but she peered past him anyway, and glimpsed his meager progress. She beamed. 

“Are you sure you don’t need any help?”

Fine.  _Fine_. “Y'know what? If you wanna help so bad, you can do it your damn self.” He shoved the typewriter away – barely moving the heavy thing an inch – and sank into a sulk. 

“Oh, sir…” And then she was all attentiveness, of course she was, draping herself around her shoulders and laying her cheek against his hair.

He would have none of it. “Just do your job.”

His fuming didn’t put her off in the slightest. Moving her hands to rub his shoulders just the way he liked, she kissed his head and murmured, “Thank you, sir.”

“…Mmm?”

“You know it would break my heart if you didn’t need me anymore.”

“…Well I’m always gonna need you. You’re my assistant.”

“Thank you, sir.” She practically glowed. 

And she didn’t bother telling him he’d forgotten the heading.


End file.
